Long story short, I think I gave myself food poisoning with the Company Chicken. I made it before noon and then left it on the stove until late that evening. Don’t worry, my daughter is practically psychic when it comes to that stuff. She wouldn’t touch it for some reason, but unfortunately I was sicker than I don’t know what the next day. Nothing, including giving birth to a child has been as painful as eating the Company Chicken that was left marinating in its own bacteria all day.

Since then, I have a paranoia when it comes to chicken. I found out afterwards that my made up 1 day rule was not legit when it comes to chicken. My theory was if I eat it the same day that I made it, it’s fair game no matter how late or long it had been sitting in the sun.

Well, Saturday I decided to take out drumsticks to try another friend’s chicken adobo recipe and I left the chicken out on the stove to thaw overnight. I didn’t realize until Sunday morning that it should probably have been in the refrigerator and I was stricken with the fear that the chicken was now rotten and I’d have to throw out a WHOLE package of drumsticks. That, my friend, is an unexplainable fear when  you’re on a budget.

Again, long chicken story short, I made the chicken and cooked the Aytch Ee double hockey sticks out of it (to be on the safe side). Apparently I fear waste more than pain but fortunately this time I didn’t get sick. I suddenly believed I had superhero powers and as I eyed two rotten bananas on the counter, I started to look into pressing my luck with other questionable items in my kitchen.

1.  Sour Milk- happens in my house quite often, there have been times when I’ve completely forgotten we have milk. Sour milk can be made into cottage cheese and biscuits. Some will say it’s not worth saving or trying to do anything with, but if there is a perfectly safe and easy way to make cheese out of it, why not?

2.  Rotten Bananas- Two very dark bananas are laying on my counter and of course, this is what everyone makes into banana bread. No, I’m not a baker either, but I’ve been told that you can actually buy banana bread mixes to keep on hand when you do have those bananas no one will eat.

3.  Stale Bread- There are lots of things to make stale bread out of including of course croutons and bread pudding. If, however, your bread is completely green and/or rock hard, I would suggest throwing it outside for the birds.

4.  Old Fruits and Vegetables- Didn’t find much to make with old fruits and vegetables except this article for painting with fruit. I didn’t see the word “rotten” anywhere though, so I’m assuming this is for fruit that is still good enough to eat. I won’t be painting with any perfectly good fruit any time soon. Same goes for veges, I’m afraid that once they’ve hit the limp, squishy stage, you can’t do much with them except throw them outside. It’s possible that old fruit and vegetables help plants grow.

Outsmarted by Chicken: When to Give Up

You can’t beat chicken though. Here are some rules regarding cooking and preparing chicken:

1. Keep hands and surfaces free and clean of any chicken juice. Do not cross contaminate by using the same plates and utensils for meats and veges. Wash anything that comes in contact with raw meat.

2. Chicken is supposed to have an internal temperature of 165°F and should be refrigerated immediately (there is no one day rule).

3. Thaw and marinate chicken in the refrigerator, not at room temperature.

Unfortunately, there isn’t anything you can do with bad chicken. You cannot save it or use it in another dish. If you have left it out too long (as I have) too much bacteria has grown and will most likely give you the pukes, the poops or send you to the emergency room. I have gambled on 2 lbs of drumsticks, but it was a gamble that was worth it (this time).

The only thing you can do with bad chicken is throw it out and that pretty much goes for all meat, poultry and fish. I have heard that people give their pets bad food, but I’m not quite sure how bad the food can be so I won’t suggest that.

Otherwise, in order to avoid wasting food keep a close eye on it and make a mental note of the things that need to be prepared and eaten asap. No one hates tossing out food as much as I do, but sometimes you have to. It isn’t worth getting yourself or your loved ones sick.

Choose your battles.

Save what you can, and remember: Sometimes you eat the chicken; sometimes the chicken eats you. Just how it goes sometimes.

Ingredients vary, but here are the Top 5 Easy Cheap Sandwiches (in case you’re looking for dinner ideas). ALL require bread, we use simple and plain wheat, if you happen to have fancy herby or seedy bread, lucky you.

1. Toasted PB&J

Of course the bread has to be toasted, if you need directions on that part we might be in trouble. PB&J is always a good go-to sandwich, but toasting the bread makes it better, IMHO.
Other variations: PB&Honey, PB&Banana, PB&Marshmallow aka Fluffernutter.

2. Fried Egg and Mayo

Fry an egg or two and throw it on toasted bread slathered with Mayo. Done. Some people like adding cheese, I don’t.

3. Chicken Salad

This sandwich may be the most complicated of the easy and cheap sandwiches, but come on, it basically involves canned chicken. Try this simple and speedy chicken salad recipe that I posted a while back. One of the great things about chicken salad is you can whip up a bowl of it and eat sandwiches the rest of the week.

4. Tuna Salad

My daughter loves tuna with mayo. That’s it. I like adding lots of onions. We’ve also made tuna melts with cheese toasted in the oven. Still, simplicity wins and she prefers plain old tuna with mayo, nothing else. If you want to try something different, grab a packet or two of the new flavored tunas (ie garlic herb tuna, sweet and spicy tuna), and add mayo and the rest of your regular tuna ingredients. Yummy…

Grilled Ham and Cheese

The ham can be replaced with any kind of lunchmeat in the fridge, although I don’t think I’ve tried to grill bologna with cheese. I have, however, fried bologna and let me tell you, if you absolutely have to eat bologna (baloney as it should be spelled) fry it and season it. Sounds complicated and ridiculous but there aren’t too many things that can’t be made better by frying.
Most people are of course familiar with grilled cheese, I’m just saying to take it a step further and throw on some meat. Again, if you’re not sure how to make a grilled cheese sandwich, let me know.

It’s a good idea to make things to go with the sandwiches, like soup if you’re working on anything larger than a snack (toasted PB&____ is a late night snack for me sometimes.)

I’d like to know if anyone else has any simple sandwich ideas. Please don’t suggest special occasion sandwiches–you know, the ones with the fancy stuff that you only make when you have company. Those aren’t simple or cheap. Still, gimme your easy sandwich ideas…can you tell what we’re having tonight?

Leftover Turkey Chili Recipe

Ingredients

1 1/2 teaspoons olive oil

leftover turkey pieces cut small
1 chopped onion
2 cups water
1 can of crushed tomatoes
1 can of kidney beans
1 tablespoon garlic
2 tablespoons chili powder
1/2 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper

Directions

Heat oil in a large pot and add turkey pieces; remember that leftover turkey from Thanksgiving will already be cooked. Stir in onion. Pour water into the pot. Mix in tomatoes, kidney beans, and garlic. Season with chili powder, cayenne pepper, salt, and pepper. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat, cover, and simmer.

Enjoy the turkey leftovers…and stay warm!

Now that I think about it, even when I host, I still bring the veggie tray.

Anyway, if you are the chosen one in your family to bring the ever so complicated and intricate veggie tray, try not to look like such a slacker and make the damn thing. Sure, it’s easier to buy one than to cut up and clean an entire produce section of the grocery store, but compared to the work that the turkey bringer, green bean casserole provider and pie bakers are putting in, it’s nothing.

Here are some things to make sure you include in your veggie tray, with interesting alternatives if you should decide to be the crazy-auntie-that-brings-the-veggie-tray.

Broccoli

Cauliflower

Baby Carrots

Black Olives/Spanish Olives

Dill pickles/sweet pickles

Sliced Cucumbers

Celery

Optional:  Red and yellow peppers, snap peas, grape or cherry tomatoes, radishes. Sometimes the person responsible for the veggie tray is also responsible for the cranberries or cranberry sauce as well. Or if just you need to fill in an empty space of the veggie tray, use the cranberries (no one’s going to eat them anyway).

Of course you will need to provide the veggie dip as well, but don’t freak out, in this case everyone will be more than happy with Ranch dressing squirted into a cute little dip dish. If you really want to impress everyone with your veggie tray skills, try one of these spinach veggie dips from cooks.com. Pretty sure it involves mayo and some spinach mixed together, but being the underachiever that I am I couldn’t tell you for sure. I squirt the Ranch into a small bowl.

Anyway, when your family members are raving about what a fantastic veggie tray you make, be sure to let them know where you got the recipe.

Or not. I’m thinking about experimenting with fruit trays one of these days. Not sure I’m ready for that though.

Ingredients:

Iceberg and Romaine Lettuce
Grape tomatoes
Pepperoni
Black Olives
Artichoke Hearts
Italian Salad Dressing

Obviously you just toss it all together. Seems like I should’ve been aware of a great easy salad like this one, but I wasn’t until my co-worker shared it with me recently. I also throw in a couple pepperoncinis and any other produce that’s handy.

If I don’t have both Iceberg and Romaine lettuce, I’ll use just the Romaine. Iceberg just kind of stretches the salad more. I also use the little packages of sliced pepperoni, and the cans of olives and artichoke hearts. Besides a little chopping, this salad pretty much makes itself, saves me some lunch money, and tastes great. Definitely one of my favorite lunches.

“Nah, that’s okay, Mom,” I told her. In case you’re not familiar with cans of Cream of anything soups, they don’t actually consist of anything but cream.

“Oh wait, I also have Tomato.”

Really? That’s even better. By the way, she means well.

So, as promised, and because I’m utterly disgusted at this point with cans of tuna, ramen noodles, soup and lunchmeat here is my chicken salad recipe. I won’t say it’s the best recipe out there but it certainly serves its purpose and for me it will be a nice change.

The Cheapest and Easiest Lunch Ingredients

1 Can of Chunky Chicken (If you’re grossed out by this use chicken breast but it’s not as cheap.)
Miracle Whip
Sour Cream
Diced Cucumber
Diced Onion
A Sprinkle of Mustard Powder
A Sprinkle of Dill Weed
Chopped Carrots (or any other crunchy vegetable you have. I also like to add chopped apple but my daughter doesn’t like that.)

Drain the can of chicken first. The rest of the ingredients are usually somewhere in my refrigerator as I’m a sucker for fresh produce (which by the way is the majority of my grocery bill). Sour cream is not necessary either it just makes the chicken salad creamier without adding a ton of Miracle Whip.

Mix everything together and refrigerate. I already have my wheat bread at work in the refrigerator so I just grab the bowl of chicken salad. I also take sandwich bags of chips or crackers along to go with it. If I have red or yellow peppers I slice them in strips and take them along with Ranch dressing.

This recipe makes enough to last me almost a week and includes the mornings I grab a half sandwich for breakfast. This doesn’t mean I can survive on it the entire week though. Unfortunately I’m usually sick of chicken salad by day 3. Yet after the lazy lunches I’ve had lately, it’ll be a treat and I’m actually looking forward to it.