In fact, I ran in and out today and swear I still didn’t see any kind of school supply list depot. People like myself require colorful banners. Anyway, I digress.

Her children are middle school and high school and her thoughts on the list were parallel with mine. The email started with “after reading over this, I realized that this list is dumb.”

I imagined a Kindergarten school list to consist of a box of crayons and a pencil, which I have an abundance of. It appears that I have much more to learn about parenting than I thought.

KINDERGARTEN

1 LARGE backpack
I’m not quite sure what they mean by large, that’s a rather vague description, but I’d prefer to not send my daughter to school with a backpack bigger than she is. Unless they’re going camping or are learning how to become professional backpackers, a regular backpack should be sufficient.

1 PKG. of cookies, crackers, cereal, fruit snacks, etc., for class snack
So which poor kid has the parent that sends cereal for class snack? Do you want your kid to be the one with the crappy snack? I’m guessing these are the same parents that pass out apples or packets of oatmeal for Halloween.

4 100-120 page spiral notebook. Must be spiral – wide ruled
This makes sense except what happened to those weird brown pads of paper that Kindergarteners used. You know, the ones with only 5 lines per page. I seem to remember a native american on the front (which I know wouldn’t be appropriate these days) but those didn’t have spirals either. They were just glued at the top. Does anyone know the purpose of the spiral?

10 glue sticks
As my co-worker stated “do they really expect you to send 10 glue sticks to school on the first day plus two bottles of Elmer’s glue? (see below) Kindergarten is apparently sticky.

1 box Kleenex
10 boxes of Kleenex would make sense.

2 bottles Elmer’s School Glue (washable – 4 oz.)
Again, we’re talking about a lot of glue. And how is being able to glue well educational? This is seriously one of those things you learn in school that will never matter. I have never been rated on my ability to glue.

1 ten pack of Crayola Classic Color Markers
Specifically Crayola Classic Color Markers? Really?

1 24 pack Crayola Crayons
Why not a generic Dollar Store pack of crayons? Does this matter?

Crayola watercolor paint set
Crayola must own all rights to the Kindergarten school supply list. There are a lot of Crayola products on this list.

$5.00 party money
What kind of party are we talking about here? I have half a mind to wander around Walmart asking the employees where the $5.00 party money is. This, in my opinion is not a school supply.

2 whiteboard dry erase markers
Apparently Crayola didn’t buy the rights to the Kindergarten requirement for dry erase markers.

1 eight pack Crayola Crayons
What? A 24 pack and an 8 pack? What about just the 24 pack and when she’s coloring she just says it’s the one from the 8 pack (or whatever is required)?

Anyway, pretty simple it seems and won’t cost an arm and a leg (no fancy calculators needed at this point). As my very wise co-worker noted, though, “I think they are missing a very important word on the list – WASHABLE – for the markers and the paints.” I’m one of those people that will stand in the aisle now, contemplating whether I should buy washable or not. After all, they didn’t specify.

I’m no rebel or non-conformist so I, like many other parents, will undoubtedly follow the guidelines and buy exactly what is asked for on the list.

After all, it’s Kindergarten. Don’t want to take the chance of messing that up.