Valentine’s Day is Not for Uncrafty Parents

Dear Kindergarten Teacher:

Please don’t assign homework that involves crafts. Daughter’s Mother is the uncraftiest person on earth. And I don’t even care if that’s not a word. You know what I mean. Why a Valentine box? I think we used to bring our Valentine cards to school in old plastic shopping bags. I’m seriously wondering if the assignment was just so I’d get glue all over my pants, my hands, my couch and everything else within a 2 foot radius of me. If it was, I deserve an A+.

Thanks,

Miss Bankrupt, the Uncraftiest

Anyway, before everyone attacks me with “why are you such a loser mom”, I’ll add that I do understand the concept of the Valentine card box and think it’s a very cute idea. But, I found out tonight that I am even worse at crafts than I had ever imagined.

Valentine Card Box Donts

Don’t try to wrap a box with construction paper. First of all, the pages aren’t big enough and you’ll have to kind of put together a patchwork design. Construction paper is also extremely difficult to fold and maneuver, especially if it’s sopped in Elmer’s glue.

Don’t wait until the last minute to make the Valentine card box. Even if you think you already have an old Valentine heart box that only requires adding a slot. Because, as life goes, you will find out the night before that you through that dumb thing away a long time ago.

Don’t try to cover the half of the box not covered with the glued, messy, falling off construction paper, with tissue paper. Gluey tissue paper is almost as bad as gluey construction paper and ends up looking really bizarre.

Valentine Card Box Do’s

Do use pink or red wrapping paper and tape to wrap the box. Much easier to work with and no mess.

Do keep trying. After all, do you want your kid to be the only one without a Valentine’s Day box? No. Most moms have probably been working on theirs since January, so I suggest taking it seriously.

Do make sure you have someone crafty to help in case of emergencies such as this. Craftiness apparently skips generations, which is lucky for my daughter.

Even with help, that Valentine’s Day box was the most difficult thing I’ve attempted in a long long time. Finally got it done with the help of Grandma, and whipped up the cutest dang Valentine’s Day box ever.

I think so anyway. And so does dear daughter…